Why We Need to Stop Reassuring Dancers
No matter how you came to be a dance teacher, I’m sure along the way, someone told you, or you decided for yourself, that reassuring your students was of the utmost importance. When they’re little, we reassure dancers that they’ll get it if they keep trying, and compliment their progress. As young and pre-teen dancers, we reassure them that with practice and dedication, they will get to that milestone they’re yearning for, whether it be pointe work, a competition solo, or a specific role in a production. And as teen and adult dancers, it seems all we do is reassure. The older dancers get, the louder their insecurities, perfectionism and self-criticism becomes, so it’s our job as teachers to reassure them. Right?
Wrong.
I’m talking about a very specific kind of reassurance that runs rampant in the dance world: reassuring dancers about their bodies. This often plays out in the studio something like this…
You’re working with a dance student in class, perhaps on their line, or with a specific movement. You’re offering corrections and feedback, and your student is trying to apply them to feel and see the correction. They’re getting frustrated. You can see it on their face, and in their body language. Suddenly, she throws up her arms, sighs, and say something like, “I can’t. It won’t work. My butt/stomach/boobs/etc) are too big.” You rush to say something to soothe them, like, ‘Oh no, don’t say that! Your body is beautiful!’
That’s the type of reassurance I’m talking about. The type of reassurance that a dancer looks great, even if, and when they’re disparaging their looks, appearance, or reflection in the mirror. Because here’s the thing…
Having a healthy and resilient body image is an inside job. It starts with realizing that even though dance is an aesthetic based art, how we look is not where our value lies. We are more than our bodies, and what they look like, or what they do. Our body’s sole purpose (even in a dance classroom) isn’t to be looked at; it’s to be used to express, to emote, and to communicate.
Having a healthy, resilient, and positive body image is an inside job. Therefore, no amount of reassuring your students they look great is going to help them. When we reassure dancers about their looks, or appearance (even if we have the best intentions), we’re reinforcing the idea that looks and appearance are what’s most important. Which only breeds more reliance on outward appearance, which means you’ll continue to have to reassure them; it’s a vicious cycle that doesn’t actually help anyone.
What will help them is modeling body neutral language and habits yourself, and making a focused effort to pass those habits onto your students. Start to re-learn how you view, and treat your body with a body kind approach, so you begin to see that the body is an instrument, not an ornament (<— that phrase is from the book, More Than a Body, which I highly recommend).
My Body Kind Ballet Workshops are a great place to start with introducing dancers to the concept of body kindness. In these workshops, we focus on three, unique pillars to transform how dancers view themselves, to build confidence, resilience, and INNER reassurance:
Befriend Your Body - By becoming aware of the ways we self-objectify, and refocusing our attention on respecting all our body does for us.
Calm the Inner Critic - By learning about the things perfectionistic habits that sabotage our growth and reframing critical thoughts with growth mindset.
Become the Most Confident Dancer in the Room - By practicing the body kind skills you learn, and replacing unhelpful sources of stress and comparison with positive forms of support.
Click the button above to see all the details about booking a Body Kind Workshop for your dancers. You can also download a free, beautiful guide and FAQ right here.
I hope this has given you some food for thought, and that this is the start of a beautiful, body kind journey, for you, and your dance students!